The Orange Box Lays Off Mystery Shopper

Central Valley, CA – Today, 1:07 P.M. after being an Orange Box Mystery Shopper for over five months, Sean’s lucrative job as a Mystery Shopper has been downsized, states the large orange corporation this afternoon. Management at the Orange Box has decided that Sean’s employment will no longer be necessary and they thanked him for his invaluable service to the company.

“A going-away party will be held in his honor,” said one of his peers. “He will be surely missed as he strolls down the plumbing aisle looking for PVC, and in lighting glowing over new ceiling fans.”

“Sean’s main job was to better understand the Box’s customers and refine the business. He reported on the customer service skills of our employees, as to how helpful they were and their cheerfulness in the workplace. He also made recommendations in regards to customer service improvements. He also evaluated prices and products between other hardware institutions. He was talented and used to his full potential," said the head administrator at the Central Valley District Office.

Joe, Store Manager at the Central Valley store commented in a meeting with the media today about the layoff, “A mystery shopper (also called a 'secret shopper') is someone who is hired to pose as a regular customer at a store or restaurant, so that they can report back what the average customer experience is for that establishment. Sean was given a specific assignment to shop at a specific store, reports on exactly what happened when he visited, and was then paid for shopping. He was a great asset to the company.”

Bob, Sean’s boss said, “His services were invaluable and a new customer service program is being adopted to replace the aging mystery shopper program. Therefore, we no longer need his talented service. He is still welcome to shop with us and we look forward to seeing him on the weekends.”

In many ways, mystery shopping is the perfect job. Mystery shoppers can be virtually any age or gender. It is the perfect opportunity for stay-at-home moms, for example, but there are also of plenty of mystery shoppers who are men. Unfortunately, companies are going to internal shopping and customer service academies for their customer service information, which is not good for the professional mystery shopper like Sean.

When asked what he was going to do next, Sean stated that he starts a new Land Planning career in Modesto next week. He is excited about the new opportunity and is sad that the mystery shopping career has come to an end.

“I love the Box,” Sean stated, giggling. “I'll miss going there with the limited crowds during the day, I will miss the people, and I look forward to seeing my old pals on the weekends when the lawn mower breaks or when I need fertilizer. All is not lost, just time for a change.”

Sean is looking forward to starting his new job next week. A congratulations is in order to a happy ending and a new beginning.